Focus on the blessings

Sunday, May 5, 2013


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"It is always wise to stop wishing for things long enough to enjoy the fragrance of those now flowering."  ~Patrice Gifford

There was a season in my life while living with infertility and before adopting our son and daughter, that my longing to become a mother almost destroyed my happiness. It reached a point where it impeded my ability to be truly happy and content.  While I loved my husband dearly and loved our life together, my heart always seemed to feel heavy with the distant feeling that something was missing.  This sadness in my heart just wouldn't go away.

Sadly during this time....I too often failed to focus on all the many blessings that were right in front of me.  I had an amazing and faithful husband who loved me dearly and made me feel so special...we had our good health, we had all the time in the world to take trips and travel to so many fun places together...we had our careers and were blessed financially. And yet with all of that,  I sadly still chose to focus too much on what I didn't have---and that was not being able to bear children and be a mother.

Now almost seven years later since that season of my life I have become the mother to my sweet son, Noah and our precious daughter, Taylor.  I can say without hesitation through this process that I've learned so many invaluable life lessons---most importantly about the power of prayer, keeping one's faith and the importance of waiting on the Lord's timing in our lives.

I've learned through my infertility that we too often waste too much emotional energy worrying about all the things we think we don't have in our lives when instead, we should make a conscious choice daily to focus on all the things we DO have.  It's not always easy to do this...believe me, I know--- without question some days are harder than others to do this, but when we do...we come to see how life is so much sweeter and rewarding when we focus on all the good that we have been given.   And in the process we tend to free ourselves of all the emotional baggage we were carrying around and come to a place of greater peace and happiness.

So today on this beautiful Sabbath Day, I've been counting my many blessings as a wife and mother....let me share...

I have always loved pretty flowers.  My son and dear hubby know this.  At a young age, Jody would take Noah outside and help him look for a pretty flower to pick for me.  This always warmed my heart that they would do this kind act together for me.  I will always be grateful to Jody for teaching Noah this kind act of love for his mother.  Now Noah does it without even being reminded by his Daddy.  

He loves to pick me flowers...oh my---it is the sweetest thing and always brings a tear to my eye and warms my heart. 

How grateful I am today (and everyday) for my precious son and how he always wants to pick his mama such beautiful flowers.  He found this pretty one today outside our church.  I will never forget the huge smile he had across his face today as he ran up to me in the hallway of church to give it to me.  

Yes, on this Sabbath Day, I am taking a moment to pause and smell all the beautiful fragrances of my life...the tender mercies I have felt from my Heavenly Father as I have traveled down the road to motherhood because of my infertility. I have immense gratitude in my heart for the gift of motherhood--as hard as it may be some days, because of great challenges I had to overcome to get this chance at raising my children, I never take one day with them for granted.  

While living with infertility continues to be challenging and painful at times, the blessings that have come into my life because of this trial have made it all worth it.   I have seen first-hand how when we exercise greater faith, even if it's just a small amount--- even the size of a tiny mustard seed, the Lord can and will work miracles in our lives.  We must be patient in the process though.  Heavenly Father allows his children to sometimes to be stretched and refined more than we like or thought possible  and yet it is in these moments, He is teaching our very souls the much needed lessons that only He knows we need.  And if we are faithful to Him and keep moving forward one day at a time--- the blessings and answered prayers can and will inevitably begin to flow into our lives.  It is sometimes only then that we realize the thousands of prayers we offered were indeed heard, but they had to be answered in His timing.  It is in these moments that we better understand that the long wait was well worth it.

How thankful I am that Heavenly Father (and Noah and Taylor's birthmothers) entrusted me to mother these precious children.  They (along with my dear husband) bring me more joy and happiness in this life than I ever thought possible.   As we grow in our capacities to see and enjoy the joys that God places in our lives, life can and will become a glorious experience of discovering His endless wonders for us. 

My heart is overflowing with gratitude today for the wonders He has created in my life... 

xo,

Jennifer

2 comments:

  1. Such a wonderful post! I know many who have struggled (and now have beautiful children, either biological or adopted) and some who are still struggling. While I was able to have two easily, I still think we all need to be reminded to live in the moment. I am loving your new header, and your profile pic is amazing!!

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  2. Beautiful post I agree.... If you don't mind me asking, how are things going with your foster son? I don't see as many pictures or posts about hopefully making him apart of your family too. The reason I ask is we have been thinking of fostering and I wonder the feelings you have with it.

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